I'm taking a break to share some news. And general excitement/fear.
I graduated. It's weird to consider myself an alumna of Jewell. I think in my mind I'll always be a student there. This has been the weirdest feeling of my life. It really feels like most any other summer, except that in the deep recesses of my brain I know that I won't be going back to Jewell in the Fall. And now I feel like I just have too much time on my hands. Weird.
So, the day before graduation I had an interview at Children's Mercy to work in the Cytogenetics Lab. First I met with HR, the the lab supervisor, then the lab director. Honestly, I don't think it really went that well. I'm not totally sure that a clinical lab is the right setting for me. I have research at heart and I'm not sure working there will satisfy me. That said, I would love to have a job right now, and if I was hired, I would definitely consider it.
Now I have an interview at Stowers next Thursday. It's in the Gibson lab. I want this so bad I can taste it and I'm willing to be cliche. The more I read about developmental biology the more I am interested in its potential. I think that Stowers would be the perfect place for me. I love KC and would love to spend some quality time there as an adult not in school.
I feel like things are really starting to happen. I just don't want to blow it by wanting it too much.
Breathe.
Thursday, May 21, 2009
Friday, April 24, 2009
underneath the skin
# 2
I think that for the most part the different parts of my body seem to be fairly normal-looking. They are approximately in proportion with one another and all look like standard versions of other people's body parts. There is one (or two rather) exception.
My feet. As a general rule, I'm not really a fan of most feet anyway, but mine feel especially foreign on my body. They are clearly reminiscent of hobbit feet, rather squarish with a few stray hairs on the tops.
I do like the scars I have from my surgery; they are kind of neat. Especially where the two scars don't overlap.
As I've gotten older and my feet have taken more abuse, there are strange little knobs on their sides. These are probably not good, but they don't bother me yet.
My toenails are small.
My feet are weird, but they probably fit me.
I think that for the most part the different parts of my body seem to be fairly normal-looking. They are approximately in proportion with one another and all look like standard versions of other people's body parts. There is one (or two rather) exception.
My feet. As a general rule, I'm not really a fan of most feet anyway, but mine feel especially foreign on my body. They are clearly reminiscent of hobbit feet, rather squarish with a few stray hairs on the tops.
I do like the scars I have from my surgery; they are kind of neat. Especially where the two scars don't overlap.
As I've gotten older and my feet have taken more abuse, there are strange little knobs on their sides. These are probably not good, but they don't bother me yet.
My toenails are small.
My feet are weird, but they probably fit me.
Friday, April 17, 2009
july, july!
I have decided to mix things up a bit, chart myself a new course. A blogging course at least. It might be copying from Nicole Krauss...just a little for inspiration.
I have come to realize in my life that most of the time there is little I am certain about. There are a ridiculous amount of unknowns. I've realized that I focus too much on these question marks and as such I worry about things I don't need to. So, I am going to start focusing on what I do know. What I have learned, the easy or hard way. What I feel is right in the world. In my life and the lives of those around me. I am hoping that this way I will be able to focus more on positive and tangible things that will remind me of why this life is so incredible.
#1
The part of my life that is the most stable, the most constant, and the part that will always be true and honest is the part of my life which centers around my mother. As much as I joke about her and take it light-heartedly, I get teary-eyed when I think of a life without her. She knows me inside and out, probably better than I understand myself and she knows just how to keep me in line. She has always put my needs first in her life and done her best to protect me. Sometimes the threat was real and tangible, but mostly it wasn't and I thought she was just being overbearring. I now realize that she has always had my best interest at heart and she just wants me to be happy; to know love and kindness, and to never live outside of the moment. She is beautiful and clever and sometimes sad and angry, but she is and always will be my mother. Our relationship is the most real thing in the world to me; the thing I understand and treasure the most.
I have come to realize in my life that most of the time there is little I am certain about. There are a ridiculous amount of unknowns. I've realized that I focus too much on these question marks and as such I worry about things I don't need to. So, I am going to start focusing on what I do know. What I have learned, the easy or hard way. What I feel is right in the world. In my life and the lives of those around me. I am hoping that this way I will be able to focus more on positive and tangible things that will remind me of why this life is so incredible.
#1
The part of my life that is the most stable, the most constant, and the part that will always be true and honest is the part of my life which centers around my mother. As much as I joke about her and take it light-heartedly, I get teary-eyed when I think of a life without her. She knows me inside and out, probably better than I understand myself and she knows just how to keep me in line. She has always put my needs first in her life and done her best to protect me. Sometimes the threat was real and tangible, but mostly it wasn't and I thought she was just being overbearring. I now realize that she has always had my best interest at heart and she just wants me to be happy; to know love and kindness, and to never live outside of the moment. She is beautiful and clever and sometimes sad and angry, but she is and always will be my mother. Our relationship is the most real thing in the world to me; the thing I understand and treasure the most.
Sunday, April 12, 2009
come crash
So, I'm mixing things up. It's going to be a bit different, but now is not quite the time. I'm not quite in the right place. But get ready, it's coming.
Monday, March 16, 2009
lost in the plot
Spring Break '09.
I needed a break in the worst way. This past week has been sickly and tiring. I managed to get everything finished on time, but I needed to go home.
Last night I went with Anna and Katie to see Andrew Bird! He was fantastic. In general, I try not to compare concerts because they are usually so good, but in different ways. Andrew is definitely the most talented and unique popular musician I've seen live. His skill is ridiculous. I just love how he loops different components of the songs together. There were a couple of times that he and his band actually messed up and had to restart. On one hand it is a little bit lame to go to a concert and have the band restart the song, but on the other, if you think about it, when he loops the songs like that, if one part is not right, then it's going to be wrong the whole time. So, I didn't mind. I think my favorite part was definitely the gramophones on stage. I think they were a mix of decoration and functional speakers. There was also a double-gramophone that spun in time with certain songs. There was a microphone positioned at each of the ends and as the sound came out, because of the doppler effect, they kept their own time. It was really neat. Bah, great show.
So far being at home has been pretty peaceful, very renewing. I feel like I'm heading into the home stretch and it's nice to check in first. Crazy though. Strangely, it has also been reassuring. I like coming home and being reminded of who I am. Sometimes I feel that gets a little lost on The Hill.
I got about 10GB worth of new music on Saturday. I'm in indie heaven.
I needed a break in the worst way. This past week has been sickly and tiring. I managed to get everything finished on time, but I needed to go home.
Last night I went with Anna and Katie to see Andrew Bird! He was fantastic. In general, I try not to compare concerts because they are usually so good, but in different ways. Andrew is definitely the most talented and unique popular musician I've seen live. His skill is ridiculous. I just love how he loops different components of the songs together. There were a couple of times that he and his band actually messed up and had to restart. On one hand it is a little bit lame to go to a concert and have the band restart the song, but on the other, if you think about it, when he loops the songs like that, if one part is not right, then it's going to be wrong the whole time. So, I didn't mind. I think my favorite part was definitely the gramophones on stage. I think they were a mix of decoration and functional speakers. There was also a double-gramophone that spun in time with certain songs. There was a microphone positioned at each of the ends and as the sound came out, because of the doppler effect, they kept their own time. It was really neat. Bah, great show.
So far being at home has been pretty peaceful, very renewing. I feel like I'm heading into the home stretch and it's nice to check in first. Crazy though. Strangely, it has also been reassuring. I like coming home and being reminded of who I am. Sometimes I feel that gets a little lost on The Hill.
I got about 10GB worth of new music on Saturday. I'm in indie heaven.
Thursday, February 19, 2009
glittering blackness
I'm feeling very awake right now. I think just being out late with other people is enough to keep me alert.
Life is good! I have a few exciting weeks coming up. Lots of work to do, but also lots of fun to be had; two concerts in two weeks (ish). And I get to meet some pretty sweet people at the Cope Lecture and Achievement Day.
I get crushes too easily. That's something I don't like about myself. It makes me feel shallow and a little needy. I don't like to think of myself as either of those things and so it's a little disconcerning. It's just that I get a crush and then it gets to be too much. Plus this time around I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one. And the other one will win. I'm so lame!
Moving on, I had my first official job interview the other day. Well, it was for a staffing agency and not a specific position, but I think it still counts. It went well, but I feel so green about this whole process. I need to get some more job knowledge.
I really need some time off.
I like shuffleboard.
Life is good! I have a few exciting weeks coming up. Lots of work to do, but also lots of fun to be had; two concerts in two weeks (ish). And I get to meet some pretty sweet people at the Cope Lecture and Achievement Day.
I get crushes too easily. That's something I don't like about myself. It makes me feel shallow and a little needy. I don't like to think of myself as either of those things and so it's a little disconcerning. It's just that I get a crush and then it gets to be too much. Plus this time around I'm pretty sure I'm not the only one. And the other one will win. I'm so lame!
Moving on, I had my first official job interview the other day. Well, it was for a staffing agency and not a specific position, but I think it still counts. It went well, but I feel so green about this whole process. I need to get some more job knowledge.
I really need some time off.
I like shuffleboard.
Tuesday, February 3, 2009
the birth and death of the day
I have had an exceptionally lovely day. And it's not even over yet.
The weather is cold, but sunny, my favorite, and although I didn't really wear an appropriate jacket, I'm pleased.
Pryor went very well this morning. I'm very glad that we are going to do the Campus Kicthens Project. It is going to fill such an important need in the community and I think it will really help show Jewell's commitment to service to the greater KC area. We formed into project teams this morning and assigned classroom roles for the rest of the semester and I am very happy about my choices. I'm going to help coordinate volunteers for the project which is something I love to do.
Instrumental was awesome today. I have to admit that so far there is a little more physics involved than I had anticipated, so sometimes it gets confusing, but today I totally understood. And by far the coolest thing I have learned this semester we discussed in class, which was why carrots look orange. The reason is becuase carrots are comprised largely of a compound called beta carotene. The structure of beta carotene contains a number of double bonds which result in delocalized electrons. The more delocalized electrons there are, the more potential jumps between energy levels the molcule can make. With more possible changes in energy, the compound will absorb visible light of a specific wavelength, which corresponds to a color. The opposite of that color is the color that it appears. Beta carotene actually abosrbs blue light and so it appears orange. Hooray!
The rest of the day has honestly been a little disappointing comparatively, but still good. The sun is shining, I'm listening to some sweet tunes, I have work to do, but not too much, and everything is right.
The weather is cold, but sunny, my favorite, and although I didn't really wear an appropriate jacket, I'm pleased.
Pryor went very well this morning. I'm very glad that we are going to do the Campus Kicthens Project. It is going to fill such an important need in the community and I think it will really help show Jewell's commitment to service to the greater KC area. We formed into project teams this morning and assigned classroom roles for the rest of the semester and I am very happy about my choices. I'm going to help coordinate volunteers for the project which is something I love to do.
Instrumental was awesome today. I have to admit that so far there is a little more physics involved than I had anticipated, so sometimes it gets confusing, but today I totally understood. And by far the coolest thing I have learned this semester we discussed in class, which was why carrots look orange. The reason is becuase carrots are comprised largely of a compound called beta carotene. The structure of beta carotene contains a number of double bonds which result in delocalized electrons. The more delocalized electrons there are, the more potential jumps between energy levels the molcule can make. With more possible changes in energy, the compound will absorb visible light of a specific wavelength, which corresponds to a color. The opposite of that color is the color that it appears. Beta carotene actually abosrbs blue light and so it appears orange. Hooray!
The rest of the day has honestly been a little disappointing comparatively, but still good. The sun is shining, I'm listening to some sweet tunes, I have work to do, but not too much, and everything is right.
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